Holding Court

So the courts have messed everything up.

I haven't seen anyone for my meds yet and I'm running out. I'm tired of calling the hospital in Carroll to get refills because I'm waiting for the court to contact my therapist and get me court ordered to Sioux City.

(The courts were involved in my hospitalization. It was the safest route for me at the time.)

I'm frustrated and upset. I need my medication so I can function normally and not go back into the hell I just escaped from.  It's just so frustrating. Being so proactive in my mental health care and have so many hurtles to jump so others are on the same page as me.

All I want is to get better. It feels like I can't take a step forward without going three steps back. It's all counter productive and irritating.

I have broken down and cried twice already because of how frustrating this is. I know I sound erratic and overly sensitive to all of this, but in the end all I want is to be mentally stable and I can't do that if I can't get the necessary medication.

I can only take one day at a time. That's all I can ask of myself.